She knows her BF treats her like dirt but she won’t leave him!

On July 11th I went to work at a job with my co-worker who was picking me up from my place. On the ride to work, I noticed a girl in the front of the truck (since the two of us were in the back). From the get go I was infatuated by her beauty and her free spirit (she was dancing along with a friend in the front as the dad drove).

It wasn’t until after we got to the job, and she came out as well, that I really got a good look at her. Surprisingly enough she was easy to talk to (which she later admits she thought I’d be “too cool” to talk to her. Anyway, we hit it off well as we walked around waiting for the time when work starts, just talking and getting to know each other until she had to go. She came back a little later with a guy driving the car, who I started to wonder if it was her boyfriend. Still weeding out the situation, I head over to her slowly and try a conversation, which she seemed hesitant about, unlike before. Luckily, a stray kitten was around and she mentioned how she loves cats. So I called the cat over and started to pet it, after I noticed it trying to get attention. That kind of broke the ice for the second time.

A few days later (one or two), I get a phone call from her. She had gotten my number from her brother’s cellphone to apologize about telling the girls at her modeling studio about me, and getting one of them interested in me (though probably as a joke). We talked for a long time, from about 9-10 PM to 2 AM. We really started to hit things off, and I really started to get to know the real her and found out the guy really was her boyfriend. However, it seems that things weren’t going so well for them seeing as he has anger problems at times and also smokes constantly, even though she’s asked him to stop. (She’s 16, he’s 19…same age as I.)

I unfortunately had to leave on the 15th, putting much of the probably needed contact on hold until I got back on the 30th. However, due to some weird act of God, I was able to spend the night over by them the night before I traveled and talked with her for a good while. One of the things she said, was that if her boyfriend messes up one more time, that would be it.

On my trip, I find out that he’s messed up quite a few times and she hasn’t done anything about it. I visited them once more to drop off some gifts I had gotten from away, such as a poster of a movie she likes, some sweets and a piece of jewelery. The boyfriend’s sister, who likes her brother (my co-worker), was also there and started putting one and one together so she started to tease her a little, asking if I liked her, etc.

It’s almost been a month now, with me playing second fiddle to this guy, where as she keeps telling me that I\’m her dream guy. Granted, I feel the same way towards her, and I really don’t want to let it just end up with us being friends…but it\’s really starting to hurt me emotionally because she’s afraid of what her current might say or do. Last night she had a pageant, and though she didn\’t win (though she should have, and I’m not being biased with that), she kind of gave me a cold shoulder since her current was there as well, along with his sister and mother (the mother called her today asking if I liked her since I knew so much about her and how she felt). All of her family likes me, even to her grandmother who’s given me the pet name “Professor” which she’s never done to anyone before (at least boyfriend/friend wise). I just really don’t know what to do, and it’s starting to tear me up on the inside because of something she said as well as just wishing I could show her how I feel, without her being worried about some outside force. (The thing she said was that she was starting to drift from the boyfriend, since one night when he flipped out for no reason he went to a strip club, and said once the pageant was over she would drop him so he’d know how it felt. I haven’t seen progress on this front though…
-Dark, 19, Florida

Advice:Hi Dark, this happens a lot and eventually she will break up with him, but from what you’ve mentionned about her, I think the type of girl she is will hold her back from breaking up with him any time soon. Believe it or not, models and girls in beauty paegents have the lowest self esteem. They are really worried about thier appearance and really care what others think about them. To make a long story short, she feels comfortable with this boyfriend even though he verbally abuses her and isn’t worth her time. She’s young and can’t understand why he can’t be madly in love with her. At the same time, she thinks you might be in love with her, but she isn’t sure. And so she doesn’t want to leave her “comfortable” relationship for something new right now. She’s scared! And she wants no regrets and she doesn’t want to feel lonely for a moment in her life.

Part of her doesn’t want to hurt him either. She might end up eventually cheating on him with you (next time he does something bad) and then she’ll feel guilty, therefore ending it with him, but having you as a replacement right after. That’s usually how these types of situations pan out.

What I suggest you do, and it sounds crazy, but she’s confused, young, naive, and needs guidance. Meet with her alone, make sure there are no disturbances, and tell her straight up: You’re the most beautiful girl I know, and you can do so much better than that guy. He doesn’t deserve you. I’m here, and you can be with me intead of him. I’ll always treat you like gold. If you break up with him, you won’t be sad or alone at all, I promise. You have tons of friends, and you have me to chill with. Then, once you’re over him, maybe you’ll give me a try.

Or something along those lines. Let her think about that. She will need some time to be over him. Don’t be pushy and don’t give her choice like it’s now or never, because she will probably choose you out of fear of never finding a guy like you again and break up with him but cry because she feels bad and then get mad at you deep inside for it. Lol, I know, girls are complicated. But just telling her that everything will be great once she breaks up with him will help her lose her fears and help her know that she really doesn’t need that guy to feel comfortable and secure. – Kayce

I Regret Breaking Up With Her

Hey, here’s the thing, about 3 years ago i started dating this amazing girl, but for reasons unknown to even me i broke up with her, she took it pretty hard and i regret it ever since. Since then we moved on and actually became really good friends, but last year i told her i still had feelings for her, but she rejected me because she didnt want to ruin our frienship. I’m still really in love with her, i know using the “L” word is a rare at my age, but for me she will always be the one. What should i do? -Alex, England

Advice:Dear Alex, Are you sure you are not confused about your true feelings for this girl? If you were in love with her, why did you break up with her in the first place? From what I understand, you guys seem to be better off as friends. I know its hard trying to hide true feelings for a friend, trust me I’ve been there but I am sure she has her reasons for not wanting to be more than friends. I think you should respect her decision, because I am sure she was hurt and she might need more time to heal. Keep on being her friend, and you never what could happen further on down the road. However if you do chose to ask her again, make sure you have an approach that will sweep her off her feet. – Sasha

How Can I Make My Parents See My BF Isn’t Bad?

I recently got a new boyfriend. And i had him meet my parents. But after dinner, my parents told me that they don’t want me to date him. I asked them why, but they didn’t say anything. How can i show my parents that my bf is a good guy? Bridgett, USA

Advice:Dear Bridgett, If your parents couldn’t provide you with a reason, it’s probably that they just don’t want you to date because they don’t want you to “mess up your life.” Sometimes parents get the wrong impression of younger teen guys, because there is so much talk about teen boys that do drugs, and all sorts of other bad things. They are probably worried you are going to end up pregnant, and he will end up being some kind of a drug addict who can’t support you!! What I think, is that you should try your hardest to tell the parent you’re closer to (and that listens more) that it’s just innocent young teen dating. He treats with you the utmost respect, and he makes you feel happy. You don’t know if you’ll stay together forever… but you want to wait until you’re at least 18 for sex and he respects that… and for now he just makes you feel great and happy and is one of the best friends you’ve had so far!! (Oh, and if he wasn’t talking too much when he met your parents, or if he said weird things, just tell them that he’s SUPER shy). Hope that helps!! – Kayce

Is My BF Right – You Shouldn’t Stay Friends With Exes?

Well, I’ve had quite a few “relationships” for being 17. It’s never been anything too serious, just having fun. But I’m currently with the most amazing guy ever. I’ve never felt this way. He told me doesn’t only love me, he is in love with me. He is 19 and a sophomore in college.One thing that has hindered our relationship is the fact that I remain friends with my exes. My logic is that there is a reason my exes and I started talking. I’m always friends with a guy before I date him, so that creates a bond in a non-romantic way. Also, I do not have feelings for them anymore which is why I ended it in the first place. I’ve tried to explain to my boyfriend that he has nothing to worry about, but he and his friends agree that I shouldn’t remain friends with exes. What do you think??? – Sandy, WA, USA

Advice:Dear Sandy, I think your boyfriend has trust issues. If you say you and your exes are just friends, why should there be a reason not to believe you, unless you have given him a reason not to. I think it is awesome that you and your exes are still friends and your boyfriend should learn to deal with that. – Sasha

Advice:Hi Sandy, There is a reason your ex is your ex! But some people don’t like the idea of their partner being friends with people they saw naked or used to makeout with, etc. It makes them uncomfortable. You have great friendships with your exes and that’s great! But your boyfriend will never feel comfortable. Even if he trusts you, it disturbs him that you used to be romantic with these guys. You might need to consider finding another boyfriend that’s OK and comfortable with you hanging out with guys you used to be romantic with… or REALLY try to make your boyfriend understand and listen to your reasons for being friends with them… (example: they sucked romantically, but are fun to play video games with). – Kayce

Costume Play Jerk?

Last year me and my friend were taken to a convention in LA for just one day (anime expo 2008) and we were cosplayed (costume played) as two characters from the anime show Naruto. The people we cosplayed were part of an evil organization called Akatsuki, with ten members and each member has a partner. My friend had a different partner but when we entered the convention we met new people and we formed a big group. In the group, there was this guy who was cosplayed as my character’s partner. Every time someone asks for group pics he looks for me, i was so happy and i couldn’t wait till next year. I think i liked him and i kept talking about him all year, and my friend even found out that her friend knew him and told him to meet with us! She also keeps saying that he pulled her aside once and told her he thought I was cute. But when we went there this year, he remembered her, but she introduced me again and he just said “I met a lot of konan cosplays last year!” with a smile, and there was this girl always hanging all over him and his friends. I have never gone out on a date (and im still afraid too), but i suddenly felt a sting in my heart at the end of the con when an image of him popped in my mind, i felt anger and sadness, but i still feel like i like him, i don’t know what to do or think! – Kay, USA

Advice:Dear Kay, to me it sounds like he did like you last year, but it REALLY sounds like he found someone else (the girl that was hanging all over him and his friends) and that’s probably why he said he met a lot of Konan cos plays last year. I think he knew you guys liked each other and he wanted to avoid you so that the other girl would hang all over him!! He sounds like a huge jerk… one of those guys that wants to date all these loser-women just because they flirt and put out. When they turn 26, they’re ready to settle down with a good wholesome girl who will love them, but by then those girls are all taken and they end up marrying trash and getting married and divorced 3 times.But, this is just my opinion, I mean, it’s obvious to him that you liked him and he did tell your friend that he thought you were cute. Then he blows you off so some piece of trash can hang all over him? And the worst part is… these guys that hurt us this way, are the ones we fall madly in love with and won’t stop trying to get. – Kayce

Leave me alone!

Advice needed:: im just starting year 11 and i have been hanging round with my best friend nearly all my life.The truth is I dont like her anymore. She has turned into a slag. Wanting a boyfriend and doing all sorts with them and talking dirty over the internet to men. Its disgusting. She really is a cow and treats me horribly. How can I tell her a nicer way of leave me alone and go away, i dont like you?!?! Im really stuck on this one. – Donna-Marie, England

Advice:Hi Donna-marie! I’ve had problems like this myself many times. I would usually keep telling them I was busy, pretty much every time they asked me to hang out. Eventually they would get bored of asking and would start finding new people to hang out with. This worked for me, I guess, because I am no longer friends with anyone I don’t want to be friends with I really don’t think there is a nicer way of saying leave me alone and go away, I don’t like you (unless you lie). Even saying something like, “I don’t think we should be friends anymore because you’ve changed a lot” might seem pretty harsh and offensive to most people. But if you really want her out of your life and are comfortable telling her you don’t like her habits, you can try to tell her you think what she does is so disturbing that you don’t enjoy hanging out with her anymore. Maybe she’ll change and be a better friend, or she’ll get offended and never talk to you again. Either way, you’ll probably benefit. Best of luck! – Kayce

We like each other but he’s so busy!

I met this guy about a month ago at my church. He was filling in for our minister because he is in college studying to be a minister. I am very close with my choir director and his wife, which happen to be the guys grandparents. They had been wanting us to meet for a while and when we finally did, there was no awkward moments when we talked and we got along great. He asked me if this church was my home church. When I said yes, he said that he would definitely be back then. He told me that he already knew he liked me because I am close with his Grandma. We both like Duke. We just had a really nice conversation. He added me as a friend on facebook the next weekend. He also told his grandma (choir directors wife) that I was pretty and he asked about me a couple of weekends ago as well. He just seemed like the perfect guy. We have so much in common and I really want to get to know him. The problems are: He is at church camp all Summer during the week and he can’t take his cell phone. He is so involved with his church, work and school that I don’t know if he has time for me. Also, I have been the one contacting him. I don’t know if he’s just really busy or he’s really shy. So I have three questions. How do I know if he likes me? How can we get to know each other if he’s so busy? and I was thinking about inviting him to be a counselor with me at my church’s Vacation Bible School in a couple of weeks. Is that a good idea? Thanks for your help! – Amber, North Carolina

Advice:Hi Amber! This guy likes you. From what you’ve told me, there’s no doubt in my mind about that! Now, with him being so busy and involved in so much, the question is… are you the only girl he likes? It’s likely that he might have a few prospects, so you want to make sure you stand out from the others, if there are any. I think you should try to get involved with as many things as you can, without making yourself seem really desperate or needy. Subtly letting him know that you like him while being independant, cool, fun and exciting to be around works almost everytime. He is already attracted to you, so you already got that to your advantage. I think inviting him would be a great idea, and if he says he’s too busy, you can always tell him it’s cool, you understand how busy he is and how you think it’s great he is so inloved in his church while working and going through school. Men love slight and subtle compliments like this. And there is always time for a girlfriend, if he thinks you might be *the one* and doesn’t want you to slip away. I think he’s into you, and he probably knows you like him. I think things will work out eventually between you two. Best of luck! – Kayce

How can I help my depressed friend?

I have a friend that recently broke up with his girlfriend, and later on he told me why. My friend has many health problems and always feels sick. Also, I know most of the time he is depressed, plus its summer so he cant see his girlfriend very often. So his brothers ex-girlfriend (who used to be friends with him and is now sort of their enemy) told his girlfriend to break up with him and she did. Also when she told him, she said it didn’t really have to end. He told me he made a big mistake and told her that its over because he thinks he is hurting her emotionally, so now they rarely talk and I think he is cutting himself and even more depressed and she is crushing too. He told me he still loves her and I got a feeling she still likes him too. I feel bad for him and I need help on giving him an advice. -Kay, Las Vegas, Nevada

Advice:Hey lady! That’s a huge dilemma you have there. First of all, if he is hurting himself in any kind of way, you should talk yo someone that you trust immediately. Sometimes problems like this, no matter how hard you try or how hard you want to, you need to get someone who is older involved. Things like this might take time. I think that before two people can be in a relationship, they both need to be ready emotionally. If your friend and his ex-girlfriend want to get back together and try to make it work, then I suggest that they both take time out to get their hearts in order. If they love each other, they should want to bring out the best in each other. In order to be a good friend, boyfriend/girlfriend, ect. peoples’ hearts need to be healed. Like my mom always says, “Hurting People Hurt People”. If two people are hurt, they are going to hurt each other even worse and then they both end up damaged. I suggest that you think about what to say. Sometimes we as friends can say the smallest of things and somehow it might hurt another friend. So just make sure what you be careful with your words. Last but not least, *speak from your heart*. This is so important. If he understands that you are here for him no matter what might happen, then he knows that you are his true friend and that you do want the best for him. In the end, the final decision is his, but knowing that you were there with him through this tough time is something that he will never forget! Best of luck chica!! I will be praying for you both! – Ciara

P.S. If you seriously think he might be cutting himself or contemplating suicide, here are some great toll-free help numbers you can try calling and they may be able to give you advice on how to best counsil your friend, or get him the help he truly needs. You can call anonymously. They may even be able to suggest doctors who can give him samples of anti-depressents or suggest where to get them for free. Your friend may be upset at first (about you trying to help him) but once he is helped and not depressed anymore, he WILL be thankful for having such a caring friend.

Afraid to fly!

I have to take a family vacation next week. I have to fly and I’m afraid to fly. They say it’s safer than riding in cars, but I would rather die in a car crash than be scared to death for the 5 minutes it takes the plane to go down – you know?? Anyways, I live with my boyfriend in another state, and I have to leave him and fly by myself to meet my family in Portland Oregon where you fly over mountains. Taking a bus would be too long. I’m gonna miss my boyfriend and he can’t come… should I just go or should I make an excuse not to go?? -Sabrina, 23, Dallas, Texas

Advice: Hey lady! I know how you feel. When I was younger, I used to fly planes all the time. I was always so excited and happy, nothing really scared me. In 2007, I had to fly a plane from DFW (I’m a Texas girl too!!) to go to Maryland for Spring Break. I was so freaked out. I mean, I would NOT sit down waiting for my plane, I was so nervous. I think part of it was because I hasn’t ridden one in so long and part of it was because of the September 11th attacks. I don’t know what your faith is but I encourage you to pray (if you do believe in prayer, that is), or try to find you center or your “happy space”. Just try to find the calm. Once you do that you will be ready to get on the plane! I can tell you from experience that DFW is an AWESOME airport. My dad has went there so many times from Dallas to different places. And my family and I all flew from there to Georgia for Christmas one year. The staff is very friendly and our flights were smooth. Once you get past the first bump in the runway, you should be good to go!! P.S. Bring gum to chew on the plane. It will help your ears not to hurt when they pop!! Have fun with your family!! ^_^ – Ciara

Is She Cheating?

I think my girlfriend might be cheating on me with her supposedly “best friend.” When ever she goes to her dads house she asks me if i am alright, but I act the same as a always do when we talk on the phone or txt. When she’s at her dad’s house we don’t usually txt because she doesn’t have a cell phone. But when we do txt, she is usually with her friend, who is a single guy. When she txts me she’s uses his phone, and she gets mad at me for acting different, but I am acting like a normal everyday me. Then she stops talking to me, and doesn’t even txt me later on. Then the next time we talk on the phone she sounds guilty and I ask her if she is okay and she says she is fine. I really hope she isn’t cheating or anything like that because I really love her. I don’t want to ask her because I know she will say no. A little while back some girl messaged me and she said that her best friend said that my girlfriend was telling her guy friend how much she liked him. That really got me worried. I asked her about it, but I don’t know if she was telling the truth, thats why i need your help. Allen, Missouri

Advice: Almost all relationships have this exact problem. I think if she was cheating, she would feel so bad about it, she probably would’ve broken up with you already, or broke down crying and confessed. But I could be wrong. If she stays friends with him, I can almost guarantee that when she’s with him, he’s trying to make her fall in love with him. In 98% of guy-girl friendships, at least one friend likes the other.

Do you think the three of you could hang out more often instead of just the two of them? That way, you could see how they act around each other. Next time you plan to take your girlfriend somewhere or even hang out at your place, maybe you could tell her to bring this guy along.

Or next time she plans to hang out with him, ask if you could go with. If she asks why, you could say, “I just thought it would be fun… but I guess you don’t?” or something like that. Try not to get into a fight about it though. Just tell her how much you love spending time with her and she seems to have a lot of fun when she’s with this guy, and you thought you could have fun together. If she makes an excuse that you don’t believe, then you’ll probably know that something is going on. Maybe she’s not cheating, but maybe she likes how he flirts with her, for example. Either way, you don’t deserve that.

When I was in high school, my bf seemed to really liked one of his single girl friends. He always braged about her. In the cafeteria, I gave him a choice. Stay friends with her and I leave, or stop talking to her and I stay. He chose me, but I broke up with him 5 months later for another guy and felt terrible that I ended his friendship because he could’ve had her when I broke up with him. But I wasn’t thinking that far into the future. So, as another option, you could give her a choice – but unless you’re ready to commit to her, you’ll probably feel guilty if you end up breaking up with her. Or she might think you’re a jerk and choose staying friends with him. You know her personality best, and you know how she would react to certain things. -Kayce

How Can I Get Out Of “The Friend Zone?”

Well, there is this boy that I have liked since the 6th grade and I am now going into the 8th grade. His name is Jacob. And we are almost a perfect match because we are both popular and athletic. Everyone tells me and him that we should date and he always says that no we are only friends, and I really want to be more than that. But everytime that I try to get one of my friends to talk about it, he just says we are friends. I am tired of being only friends, and being in the ‘friend-zone’ and I need some advice on how to get out of the friend zone. Tempest, Alabama, USA

Advice: Hey chica! Being in the “friend zone” can def be frustrating. My best advice would be to ask him how he really feels about the relationship. Does he want to be only friends? Or maybe could it be something more? Boys at this age sometimes only want to focus on school, hanging out with their friends, and activites outside of school. If he says that he is not ready, then don’t hound him. But still hang out. Just because the relationship thing doesn’t work out, doesn’t mean that you guys can’t still hang. If he says yes, tell him your feelings, and soon you guys will be holding hands in the hall! Hope this helps!! –Ciara

You say that you’re a perfect match and both very athletic and whatnot. Is it possible that he says you’re just friends because you’re like “one of the guys?” I mean, can he do just about anything with you that he can do with his guy friends? If this is the case, guys don’t want to lose a perfect friendship by dating. You probably also know that in almost ALL male-female friendships, at least one friend has feelings (or once had feelings) for the other, so you’re not alone. If you can, try to find out the things that are most attractive to him and play them out the best you can. -Kayce

Why is He Still Acting Wierd?

I’ve just been really down in the dumps lately… the boy that i like, his blocked me on MSN because I asked him if he did get my offline messages, first he said he didnt get any messages, and after I told him “you must have got my messages” he said “I probably did but neva read them” and then he went all quiet with me and I got so fed up, so I kinda told him the truth and I went offline. The next day my internet wasnt working and it didnt come online for about 2 weeks. When I got my net changed, I signed in and checked to see if he blocked me, and he did…:( So now i’ve sent him about 3 emails appologizing to him, baisically I sound desperate lol, and its been more than a month now, and he still hasnt emailed back. He hasn’t checked his myspace. It’s nearly going to be a month since he hasnt been on his myspace. I don’t know what to do, im so down in the dumps, i need to think of something, because I dont have his number, and he blocked me on msn. I only know where he lives, I need to know what I’ve done wrong to make him block me like he did and hope that he will forgive me. I cry every day, thinkin that he hates me. I hate myself for turning him down when he used to like me. I just wish i could turn back the time. Im sorry about this.-Rina, 16, UK

Advice: Hi Rina, w’ere always here to help! Being a young girl aged 15-25 is tough. When someone likes you and wants you, you get scared. When someone gives you a mixed signal, you take it as a hint they like you and you fall in love. If someone you’re in love with doesn’t want you back, you don’t give up ’til they do. Anybody in the world would tell you he’s not worth your tears. If you deeply think about it, you might realise you only like him so much because he is blowing you off. That tends to make girls want a guy more. I could also tell you that you’re young enough to have a whole lifetime of dating wonderful guys. Some will be really good looking, some will be sweet, others will be jerks. But at this point, you’re so stuck on this one guy, you probably won’t care. First and foremost, stop acting desperate with him, that really scares people away. At his young age, he doesn’t want someone who’s desperate and needy. I don’t think you did anything wrong. He isn’t talking to you not because he’s mad, but because he has a girlfriend (who probably won’t last long) and he doesn’t want to get involved with another girl who acts kinda desperate with him. He’s just a kid and having more than one girl depending on him scares him away. So he blocked you because he’s scared, not because he’s mad. Once things end with his GF, he’ll be back on MySpace. If you want to put up tons of gorgeous and sexy pictures on myspace of yourself and pics of you having fun with your friends, he’ll see what he could have had. For now, the faster you get over him, the better off you’ll be. There are at least a hundred guys your age, in your area that are good looking, sweet, and would feel honored to date you! By trying to forget, and focusing on finding a brand new crush, you’ll forget this scared little boy. One day he’ll want you – and you won’t care.-Kayce

My GF thinks I’m a nutcase!

Well My girlfriend and I have been together for over a year. Last weekend I got up and left after dinner with her and one of her friends. I did this because I get uncomfortable in situations sometimes. When I do, I like to get out of there before I get a panic attack. I am shy around people, so her friend being there made me feel like I was going to have a panic attack. Is there anything I can do to fix our relationship? My now-ex girlfriend thinks I’m a mental patient and won’t have anything to do with me after I told her the reason I left. – Bryan B., Kansas, USA

Advice: Hi Bryan, That was not a problem.. You can lessen your ‘panic attack’ if you have the courage to believe in your self.. trusting your self is one big factor for you to be able to hang around with other people.. More self steem, lesser trouble with other people.. but remember, don’t be over confident it sill appear that you are boastful.. Just believe in your self and believe in god.. With God, everything is possible.. -Glenda

Panic attacks suck and a lot of people have them. If your girlfriend can’t be support of this, or at least understand, why do you want to be with her? -Kayce

I have to move to a new school this summer…

Well my family is moving this summer and I have to start a new school in the fall. I’m 14 years old, eighth grade, and very shy. I only had one friend in school which has been my neighbor so I am very nervous about going to a new school! How do 14 year old girls make new friends? Aren’t most girls at this age really stuck up and rude? – Kristy F., Alberta,

Canada

Advice: Hi Kristy, Yeah, moving to a new place is kinda hard, where you don’t know the people around you.. But do you also know that meeting new people is fun..? Yes, it is.. You can do that by initiating a small talk with a genuine enthusiasm.. By doing that you can create a new set of friends, just believe that you can do it.. i know you can. -Glenda

My Boyfriend’s a Pig!

I’ve been dating this guy for a few months now. He keeps trying to get me to shower with him and he’s not romantic at all like I always pictured a boyfriend to be. We went to our school’s Christmas dance last week and he didn’t want to slow dance with me he wanted to dirty dance to fast songs. He always wants to do more than makeout. I like him a lot and he makes me feel beautiful but he seems like a pig. He’s my first boyfriend and I’m 16. I dunno. Is this normal?-Amber, 16, Chicago

Advice: Hey Chica. Wow, that’s intense. Personally, I don’t think that this is normal. I have a question. How do you feel when you are with him? Does he make you feel gross, and slimy, and used? Does he try to get you to do things that you don’t want to do? Does he always seem like a pig?! Then maybe he isn’t the right guy for you. Whoever you’re with should make you feel comfortable and good about yourself. No one should make you feel pressured and/or less than you are. – Ciara

I don’t think this is very normal but for a dirty boy thats only using a girl for her image is not very good. So i’m not saying dump him but talk to him and tell him that if he doesn’t change he is going to be dumped and if he tries to do anything to you call the police or tell your parents. -Evelin

I Think he’s Cheating…

I called my boyfriend the other day at his buddy’s house. His buddy wasn’t there and there was a girl laughing in the background. I got mad but he made me talk to her and she said they were just friends and nothing was going on. Why should I believe her. The next day I found out there were three girls there and he was the only guy and he was flirting with one of them. So I broke up with him but now all of our friends think I over-reacted and he wants me back and I miss him. I’m trying to be strong. Should I give him another chance?-Brittnie, 19, LA

Advice: I think give him another chance. Girls get very jealous so talk to him and find out the truth and tell him you’re jealous, maybe things will work out, but i’m not totally sure. This is just my advice. -Evelin

Married at Age 15?

My boyfriend of 2 years asked me to marry him and move in with him in the new year! i’m not even done highschool yet i’m 15! but he lives by himself in a 2 bedroom apartment he works part time and his mom helpssupport him. we love each other and it seems fun but how can my parents understand?? and is it a good idea??-Hailie, 15, Idaho

Advice: That’s a lot to take in. To me, I think that you’re too young to get married and move in with someone. In most states, it’s not even legal without a parents consent. I know that the idea of marriage seems fun, but marraigae takes hard work. You have to think of the cons (bad stuff) as well as the pros (good stuff). I don’t want to be a downer, but I don’t think that this is the best idea. At 15, I was a freshman in High School, finding my way and just beginning to learn about me. Think it through and heed your parents advice. They know what they are talking about. Best of luck chica. -Ciara

Well your relationship must be very good if it lasted 2 years! if he askes you to marry tell him you’re just not ready… he might understand so your parents are upset, I think just tell him maybe when you’re 21 which is only in 6 years time -it’s amazing how time flies by. -Evelin

I’m 13 and Love my Dolls!

I’m 13 and I still enjoy playing with dolls and being a kid. I feel like everyone in my class wants to act all grown up like highschool kids. Do you think other girls my age secretly like playing with bratz and hannah montana dolls or do they really like only partying with friends and hanging out watching music videos. -Corrine, 13, WI

Advice: My advice is, I think that it’s fine that you play with dolls. At thirteen, I was a huge reader. All I loved to do was read and listen to music. Whatever you like to do is fine because you like it. Just because the crowd is doing

their own thing, doesn’t mean that you have to conform to them. Don’t be afraid to be yourself! -Ciara

It’s quite hard to guess… but most of my 13 year old friends actually still like bratz and hannah montana but i only have two 13 year old friends. I think you’ll get out of it eventually. And don’t care about what other kids do – sometimes u just have to be unexpected. -Evelin

Advice: Page 5

I Like Him… But He Likes Her

Q.I like this guy who I met at a over night function at my friend’s church (girls and guys seperate rooms of course). This guy, D, is from our school and he always tries to make fun of me. Well, during this function, I found out I had the tiniest crush on him. So, one day, I had this sleepover at my friends house. I confessed about my crush. She convinced me to write a letter to him.The other day, I gave the letter to him. After that, I found out that he likes another girl from another class. Then, a few weeks later, J told me that he likes me, even though I didn’t really like him.I know you’re gonna tell me to give D up and choose J. But the truth is, I really like D a lot. I just don’t know what to do. -Violet, age 12, Malaysia

A. Hi Violet, the right thing to do would not be to choose J because you don’t like him, and you can’t force yourself to like someone! It isn’t fair to them. Maybe D will stop liking that girl in the other class, or maybe she doesn’t like him. You can try to get D to see how much better your are than the other girl. First get him to be friends with you. Be sneaky about it though! Just find out what is his favorite activity. Is it sports? Invite him to go with you to a sports event. Or ask him if he wants to play video games with you sometime. It doesn’t even have to be just the two of you… how about with a group of friends? So when you get him to hang out with you, make sure he sees how nice you are to other people, and how smart, and funny! I’m sure once he gets to know you better he will like you back. When you said you gave him a letter, I could tell you two don’t really talk to each other very much. So I suggest get talking to him, get to be friends, tell him that you like him because he seems like a very nice guy! When you become friends with him, and he is used to being around you, the chances are great that someday, he will like you instead of the other girl.

I Have Two Boyfriends!

Q. Hi, I have 2 boyfriends. I know it sounds bad, but its not like that. One guy (Chris) is a guy I’ve crushed on for a very long time. All the girls want him. But he is so busy with his video games and sports we hardly ever see each other. The other guy (Mike) is one of those guys who is like a best friend, always there for me. Mike asked me out and I said yes because I know I am not going to marry Chris. He is not husband material. But I’m only 16 and still want Chris to be my high-school boyfriend. You know, be seen with him. The two guys don’t know about each other. Can I keep this up? Any Advice? It’s been going great for 3 months now. -Jasmine, age 16, California

A. Hi Jasmine. Of course this is going great… but think about who it’s going great for. Just you. It sounds like Chris could have just about any girl he wants and he chose you, so you must mean something to him. If your relationship isn’t going the way you want it to, you should talk to him about it. Tell him what bothers you. If working on your relationship isn’t worth it to you, you should probbly set Chris free so another girl who really wants him (and only him) can be with him and will respect him. How about Mike? You know it’s not fair to him to make him believe he has you as a girlfriend. It sounds like you want him as a friend, but want to keep him on the shelf to be a possible husband for your choosing. I don not need to tell you that you are being selfish here because you already know. So be kind to these guys and my advice would be to set them both free now since you know you will end up hurting them both in the future anyways. At least let them go now so that they don’t feel you are nothing but a selfish self-absorbed girl for making them waste their highschool years on something fake. -Kayce

Too Many Problems!

Q. I have too many problems. One is I eat too much. I am overweight. I won’t find a date for my junior prom and if I do it will be a geek because they wont have anyone to go with either. I also have to wear glasses and my parents won’t let me get contacts. They won’t let me wear a normal dress to prom either if I were to go. I would have to wear something with floral prints on it. I’m doomed to be like this forever. What should I do? -Debbie, age 14, Kentucky

A. Hi Debbie. First of all your body doesn’t have to be a certain way for you to be normal. There are a lot of plus size girls who are considered to be the most popular in their schools. There are a lot of plus size models now. They use one key tool, confidence. No matter what you look like, if you appear confident, people will like you. Now, if you think you have an eating disorder since you say you eat too much, you may want to consult your school counselor who should be able to refer you to therapy centers around your area. If you really want contacts instead of glasses, perhaps next time you go to your eye doctor, tell the doctor your concerns and asked if they will speak to your parents about the benefits of contact lenses. As far as the dress you are concerned about, try explaining to your parents you would feel more confident wearing something else. Show them pictures of what you have in mind, but make sure it is not sleazy looking or they will probably say no. -Kayce

I’m in Love with a Celeb!

Q. I have the biggest crush on Nick Jonas from the Jonas Brothers! I wrote him a letter to his fan mail address and sent him a gorgeous picture of myself and this over over 4 months ago with still no reply. I am still in love with him but he doesn’t know I exist. How can I make him notice me? -Lashaunda, age 15, Atlanta

A. Hi Lashaunda. Many celebrities feel so overwhelmed by fan mail they may not open it. It will keep building up and building up until they (or the person they hire to take care of it) can no longer handle it. It is very common for girls your age to have celebrity crushes. If getting a letter from this guy is so important to you, a few tips on getting celebs to be more likely to check their mail are to make the envelope big and colorful. This helps it stand out against all the other billions of letters. It is not guaranteed to reach him of course. But why crush on a guy who doesn’t take the time to get back to you? -Kayce

Advice: Page 4

Should I wait for him?

Advice: Hi Samantha, I was in a similar situation as this. My question to you is, why would he ask you to wait for him if he thinks you do not make him happy? I think he is afraid he will not find anyone else to love and wants to make sure you’ll wait for him just in case – which makes him selfish. Maybe he just made an excuse to break up with you so he could date other girls while he is working far away. So if this is true, you should be allowed to date others too. If he really wants you – he should be telling you he will wait for you and there is nobody else for him. He should tell you he will do his very best to make you happy and keep in touch with you while he’s away. He should try to write to you everyday that he’s gone. This is how you know he really loves you and always will. If he only wants to know if you’ll be waiting for him – but never thinks about you or writes to you or finds a way to show his love to you, then he’s not worth your wait. One thing that might also help you make a decision… I lost about 3 years of my time "waiting" for a guy who made me think he was deep in love with me, only to find out that he had many girls he liked all the same way and dated them while I sat and waited. -Kayce

My secret crush is no longer a secret!

-Rigel, 13, Philippines

Advice: Hi Rigel, that sounds really embarrassing for you! I know at your age, people are usually very secret about their crushes. Don’t worry about it too much. I bet it was a compliment for your crush. Sometimes it can be fun to let someone know you have a crush on them – it makes them feel good about themself. At16 or 17 years old, you’ll probably be proud of letting your crushes know ya like them! For now… what’s the worst that could happen? He could think about this, and decide you’re a great girl and he’s very lucky you like him out of all the guys out there. He could be embarrassed and avoid you – but if he does – it’s his loss. And if that’s what happens, I think someday he’ll realize he could’ve had you. My best advice is just to stop worrying about it, live life, and let whatever happens – just happen. Either way, you’re only young once, and have so much to look forward to. If you don’t like this advice – how about just having another friend leave a comment saying "of course she is in love with him… who isn’t? you’re a hot guy!" or leave a comment yourself saying "well maybe not in love… you’re not my type… but i think you’re kinda cute". -Kayce

Does that boy like me?

Advice: Hey Tiffany! The boy likes u! If he didn’t he wouldn’t waste his day making you laugh and smiling at u or anything. At age 11 though, it’s probably best to stay friends and not rush into dating though. Save that for the imagination – it will work out a lot better this way – trust me!. -Kayce

Im Too Shy!

Ok so i have this stupid problem where i always turn bright red when asked to speak in front of the class and i always get picked on by the teacher because im so shy. i know confidence is key but how can i get moreconfidence so im not so shy? -Sara, 14, CT

Advice: Hey Chica! First of all, being shy is NOT stupid. It’s just a part of life. It’s okay to be shy, so never feel that it isn’t. While confidence is key, believing in yourself is very important too. Sometimes confidence can come from the smallest of things. Maybe it’s wearing your favorite t-shirt, or sparkly headband. Or maybe it’s saying a mantra or your favorite scripture. Find something that makes you feel comfortable and confident and just believe. Try once a day, while you’re getting ready for school if you like, look in the mirror and find something that you love about yourself. When you see the things that you love about yourself, hopefully you’ll start to feel better. -Ciara

Everybody gets shy maybe around boys,crowds, anything. Confidence is a key so try performing to friends and parents more you get used to it and by the time your done you’ll be like you were born confidence. -Evelin

My Parent’s Treat me like a Baby!

Hi Im 12 years old and not allowed to date yet or anything. Which is okay. But my parents treat me like such a baby the won’t let me paint my room and its pink with ballerina stuff all over it. Or go to school dances so I have to tell my friends I can’t go cuz Im to busy. I am making lots of new friends at school but always make excuses they can’t come over and this girl tiffany called me a snob. So now there are roomers flying around my school that I am snobby. Plz help? -Kandyce, 12, NM

Advice: Wow, that sounds like a dilemma. Over the years, I have learned that the way you asked your parents questions for something you want to do depends on the tone of your voice, and the way you’re asking a question. Make sure that when you’re asking them to use a good tone and voice. Try to do things to show your parents that you are more responsible. This might help them let you get involved in more activities. -Ciara

I’ve got parents like yours too. Even as old as i am i’m still not allowed to change room colour but try helping them especially on saturdays. If you can cook get them dinner in bed! I think it’s perfect I did that but i’m moving houses very soon so I’ll be able to get my room colour changed. And that Tiffany girl -don’t worry about her calling you a snob. A lot of people call each other names but whats the point if they don’t get anything back. -Evelin

Is my boyfriend right?

Q. This guy Jason tackled me in the snow at school yesterday for no reason. He picked me up and threw me in the snow and stuffed snow inside my jacket. My boyfriend got all jealous and said Jason did that because he likes me. Is that true? Because he wants me to stay away from Jason.
Misty, 14, MT

Advice: Misty, Maybe Jason has a secret crush on you.. And in the first place your boyfriend won’t got jealous if he don’t feel that.. Man knows when another guy have a feeling for their girl. Believe me.. So if you love your man, follow him for a while but don’t be harsh on Jason.. Be kind and friendly with him.. – Glenda

Nerd for Life

Q. In my school we have sewing and cooking class plus carpentry and graphics where both boys and girls have to participate in all of those.Well in cooking class I was partnered up with 3 girls I know for a fact all the kids think are losers. I don’t know what they think of me because I’m shy and don’t hang out with anyone. Everyone in school has their cliques and stick to them, it’s really dumb. So anyways I was stirring the pizza sauce in cooking class and this popular boy came up to me and started flirting and saying, "here let me show you how to do this". I stepped back and let him stir. I was so happy a boy was flirting with me for the first time. Well it turns out, that when we began eating the pizza, one of the girls in my group found a tooth in our pizza. That boy slipped in someone’s tooth into our sauce while he was stirring it! The whole class was laughing because this girl’s back tooth fell out and that boy stirred it into the "loser group’s" sauce. I was humiliated. I want out of this school. The teacher didn’t do anything, she ignored everything. I told my mom and she just said "Ew, gross." The counselors in our school only deal with "real problems" they said. It’s just that in my school it’s impossible to fit in because nobody accepts anyone except their own clique. You can’t talk to them or they’ll tell you to **** off.
Kara, 13, MI

Advice: Hi Kara. This sort of problem happens a lot. It seems impossible to make friends with people like that, and parents and teachers don’t realize how big of a problem this is for you. I think the best options for you are to either sit down and have a serious talk with your mom or another close relative who can talk to the school for you. If there is a problem at school interfering with a student’s life, it is the school’s job to make the neccessary adjustments. The other option is you can try to deal with it the best you can. Keep in mind that these kids aren’t better than you. They are merely biological beings that were born in the same generation as you and feel that they need to act nasty to everyone to make themselves feel important. The other biological beings around them (their friends who you see as loving these popular kids) are meerly just people who don’t know what’s cool and what’s not so they decide to follow the mean people to avoid getting mean-ness thrown at them. – Kayce

Scared of School Dances!

Q. I’m 10 and on Valentine’s day my friend dragged me to my first pre-teen dance. She’s been going all year to these things. I had fun and even slow-danced with 3 boys. But I’m shy and scared and had her with me the whole time. Her mom came to pick us up and she said because I had fun there, next time I wouldn’t need to follow Lizzie around everywhere. Lizzie is still gonna make me go and I don’t want to be there alone. My mom wants me to go out and do things rather than me sit at home and play. I’ve been making up excuses not to go to dances all year. Should I keep making excuses or should I go to the dance and be all by myself?
-Maggie, 10, ON, Canada

Advice: Hi Maggie. Confidence is the weapon of a beautiful girl.. You enjoy the dance? Then why
deprive that enjoyment to your self?.. Go, explore, Show the world who you are and everything that makes you happy.. Don’t be shy and scared, come out from your shell.. Go girl… -Glenda

Grounded and it’s SO unfair!

Q. I skipped class 5 times. My friend called the school pretending to be my mom to excuse me. My parents found out. I’m grounded from life! They took the door for my room off the hinges. They cut electricity in my room – so no computer, no TV, no music. I can’t talk to my boyfriend on the phone because they monitor the phones. He goes to a different school. I have to be home immediately after school. The school will not excuse me anymore unless mom gives them a special code so they know it’s really her. I’m grounded this way for the rest of the school year – 3 months. Then they’re sending me to live with my auntie in the country for summer break. I think this punishment is really harsh. Should I just move out and live with my boyfriend? I think he’s gonna get bored and dump me since we can’t ever be together. He thinks I’m choosing everything over him. He doesn’t understand because he would rebel against this treatment.
Jessica, 16, MI

Advice: Hey Jessica. Do you really think that you don’t deserve that punishment?.. So why did you
ditch from class in the first place?.. right?.. Well, moving out and living with your boyfriend won’t solve your problem. Why not compromise with your parents?.. Why not talk to them and promise you will never do that again? they are your parents, their heart will melt once you talk to them and tell them that you learned your lesson.. In the case that your boyfriend will dump you, well he’s numb.. If he really love you he will understand everything and will support you and he will tell you what is the right thing to do. And again. Think before you act!! Godbless
-Glenda

I don’t wanna hurt him, but it’s over!

Q. How can I break up with a guy I’ve been with for 3 years without hurting him too much? We’re both seniors and have been together since junior year. He’s in love. And me? I love him but want to try dating other guys while I’m still young and in high school. I don’t want to cheat on him because I do love him. – Jesstine, 17, Florida

Advice: Hey Jesstine! First of all, let me just say that is awesome that you want to be up front with your guy. Most people don’t do that and I want to applaud you. I think the best thing to do is tell him the truth. Tell him exactly how you feel. If you need space, just tell him. He would appreciate hearing the truth from you than hearing it from an outside source. You have the right to be independent. Best of luck Chica! – Ciara

I’m miserable working at my job!

Q. Hi, I need some advice. I’m 18, graduated last May and since then I’ve been working as an office assistant. I’m miserable working at my job.  I miss my school days where everyone was in my age group and I could make friends with them. Now everyone I work with is in their 30’s to 50’s and treats me like I’m stupid. The pay is good, but at lunch nobody sits with me and I feel so weird going to sit with them. I actually went to a high school next door to the building to eat lunch in the cafeteria there. I could quit but I think no matter what job I get the people will be like this. How can I make older people be friendlier with me?? Thanks. -Keisha, 18, NJ

Advice: Hey Chica! I suggest going to other tables and talking with some of the workers. You know those awkward moments washing your hands? "Hey! I’m Keisha. Any tips on how to…..?" And those random moments at the copy machine. "American Idol was crazy last night, huh? Did you see the girl who fell?!" Take the random moments of life and make them worthwhile. Once you put yourself out there, your coworkers will see the type of person you are and will be excited to get to know you! Best of luck chica! – Ciara

Hmm..Seems like we both have the same problem regarding co-workers.. remember that God makes life a little rocky, not to grind you into dust but to polish you into a brilliant gem. Don’t let them turn you down, instead show them that you are not what they accused you. To let them think that you are stupid, instead show them that you are a worthy person. And try to be friendly with them. For sure not all of them don’t like you. If you want to go back to school, go..! That’s one of the greatest gift you will give to your parents and of course to your self..god bless. – Glenda

My BFF Flirts with my Crush who is in love with her!

Q. Ok, I’m in love with this guy Marc in my 2nd period gym class. Problem is, he is in love with my friend Ashlee. I always have to watch them flirting and hugging. Nobody knows I’m in love with him, but I have been since September. How can I stop liking him or should I tell Ashlee I like him?

Advice: First thing first. Do you like this guy or love this guy? The reason why I ask is, is that like and love are two TOTALLY different things. It takes time to stop liking/loving people. You really can’t rush it. If Ashlee is your bestie (best friend) Or at least a really good friend,  then go ahead and tell her the truth. If she knew, she probably wouldn’t have dated him and he would be off keeps for both of you.  Best of luck chica! – Ciara

Do you really love him? Ask yourself. If yes, does he love you back? If this Marc was with your friend, will you have the guts to ruin their relationship? Maybe he is not the right one for you so its about time for you to move on with your life. Try to look around, maybe somewhere out there needs your attention and your love.. Let this Marc and your friend be happy with their lives and so as you.. god bless..! – Glenda

Pregnant, and don’t know which father to choose!

Q. Well, I’m 17 years old. I started going out with this guy Michael about 11 months ago. About 3 months ago he asked me to marry him and I said yes. My parents have never met him and he’s 23 years old! The night he asked me to marry him we had sex and I got pregnant. I love him, but there is this other guy that I feel like I love too. His name is Dax, he’s my age, and I’ve known him for 7 years, but we have never gone out. We have always just been friends that flirted and made out. When I told Dax I got pregnant, he got mad and said that the baby was just going to separate us. He stopped talking to me for a week, which sucked ’cause we were usually talking everyday for the last 7 years. But he finally called me and told me he missed me, and said to tell everyone that the baby was his and not my boyfriend Michael’s and to introduce him to my parents as my baby’s daddy. He told me to tell my boyfriend that I was never pregnant, it was a false pregnancy. I really wanted to be with Dax, I felt more comfortable with him so I did as he said. I broke up with my bf and decided to go with Dax. Now I’m getting married to Dax in a month from now and I don’t know if I should tell Michael that he is the baby’s dad or just to live life as it is. I want to do the right thing and have my baby to grow up with his real dad. But I just found out that Michael got this other girl pregnant at the same time as me, so I don’t know what to do because I know Dax will treat my baby as if it were his own…at least I hope he will. If I tell Michael the truth, Dax will leave and I’ll just be a single mom and my baby will have a dad who will probably end up with 15 kids and no time for any of them.

Advice: Wow. This is a lot to deal with. I think that you should let the baby’s biological father know the truth. He has a right to know. If he doesn’t want to spend time with his child, then that will be his loss, his fault. It sounds like Dax is a great person, let him know what you are doing. Best of luck chica. -Ciara

If you’re having mixed feelings about this, you should consider telling everybody the truth. You might want to consider telling the biological father the truth – but also tell him that if he does not want anything to do with the baby – you are okay with that – and ask Dax if he would like to raise the baby as his own. Michael sounds like the type of guy that would be okay with this – because he got another girl pregnant and will likely have his hands full with that one already. You want to do what’s best for this baby – but you should also tell the truth because it’s going to be hard to keep a secret for the rest of your life. – Kayce

Advice | Page 2

Why is he acting weird?!

Well I really really like this guy, he used to like me at school a lot , and i told him that i did not want to go out with him, he didnt give up he kept on asking me out. Now i really like him and he knows -but he has a gf you see, so he didnt say anything to me. All he said was "oh easy" then said "what you saying about me and u then?" while he was still checking and i’ve kinda been messing him about. I know i shouldnt have done it but i told him on msn that i wanted to say something to him, he has his msn status as away so the next day he sent me an offline message back sayin "ask me next time ur online" and then when i would come online he would try n get it out of me and say things like "tell me i wont look at u diffrent or say anythin i swear" and he kept saying please. I still couldn’t tell him how i really feel about him, but the last time I spoke 2 him on msn he said that he wasn’t with her like that and that it’s not the same as it was before. He cant make his mind up wether he is with her or not and then later on I told him everythin. A few days before I told him, i asked if he was ok and that and he didnt reply back and now he is totally ignoring me and its not like him. Before he was so desperate to find out what i wanted to say, now that he knows he doesn’t talk to me, something’s not right :S
Could you help me please. -Rina, 16, UK

Advice: Hi Rina. It seems like this guy is very confused and he was just trying to get information out of you so that he could spend some time thinking about what he wants to do. It sounds to me like he wants you, but part of him is scared about leaving the other girl, so he wanted to make sure you want him before he dumps her. All he needs is some time to think. He probably wants to date you but feels guilty and scared about breaking up with this other girl. How about sending him one last message that you promise him everything will be fine if he breaks up with her. She’ll move on, and you’ll make him happy. -Kayce

EgoBoy Returns!

There’s this guy… let’s call him EgoBoy. He’s like his name suggests. He has a huge ego, and a good reason for it as well! He’s really, really hot (Gah, that sounds shallow!) and is good at pretty much any sport AND was top of the grade when we graduated from primary school. I’ve been in love with him since we were 8 when we first met – not for looks, but ’cause he was an awesome guy to be around (he always made me laugh when I needed cheering up). But as we got older, his ego got BIGGER. And when we turned 10, he began dating the bimbos and sluts of my grade (Yes, even at 10 we had bimbos and sluts) while at the same time, he flirted with me.

Well, I haven’t seen EgoBoy since we graduated from primary (3 years ago) and next year, he’s transferring back to my school. And, because of a blabby best friend who told HIS blabby best friend, "Kevin", who told him, he knows that I love him. And, from a source (his whole club sports team), he kinda freaked when he heard.

And then, there’s this other guy. Let’s call him BleachBlond. He’s two grades above me and is srsly PRETTY (geez, shallow sounding AGAIN!) and smart and really funny and overall a great person. He and I talk alot, kinda flirting and the like, and I like him. But… I know I don’t love him… because my heart is on EgoBoy (stupid heart!). Kevin (who is one of my best friends as well) and I were talking about the whole situation with EgoBoy and, told me that, and I quote, "would be the best thing for him" cause I’m the "first non-bimbo to like him. And for his personality not his looks"’ and that I should "not give up on him"! I don’t know what I to do! I’ve tried giving up on EgoBoy…but I can’t! And I don’t know what to do when EgoBoy transfers back to school… ’cause my school is REALLY BIG but, not big enough to avoid someone for two solid years.-Mary, 15, Australia

Advice: Hi Mary. Girls tend to want guys that everybody loves. The guys with not just the looks but the guy who is really charming and has lots of friends and is flooded with girls that want him. Why? Because if he chooses you out of every girl you feel special. Now, let’s take a look at your life if you were to start dating EgoBoy.

You and EgoBoy have now been a couple for 5 months. The whole school knows it. All your friends know it. Yet the stupid bimbos (since they don’t have brains) keep flirting with your boyfriend – right in front of you! And he lets it happen and stays friends with these types of girls, because he needs the ego-boost. So you’re standing there totally humiliated but he doesn’t really care – he just cares about his ego. Your whole relationship is like this for months. He feels that he never has to try to please you or impress you in any way – because of his ego – you’re lucky to be with him! He never tries to plan the most special birthday gift for you. He doesn’t bother doing anything on your annversaries. All he knows is that he is so perfect, all the babes want him, so he doesn’t need to try hard to make you happy.

Now, if you dated a guy who is totally into you – he would make you feel like a princess everyday. He wouldn’t look at other girls, he wouldn’t brag about other girls who flirted with him. If another girl flirted with him he’d talk about you the whole time and bore her with stories about how wonderful and beautiful you are. He would tell you that you are the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen, and he would put so much effort into making you feel loved.

I don’t understand why anybody would want somebody in their life who makes them feel less than they are. Sadly, a lot of girls do date guys with huge egos and feel like trash because they act like every other girl in the world is better than her so she should be lucky to be with him. You’re young, and to be honest, you won’t get over this guy anytime soon. You can’t avoid him for 2 years. If I were you, I’d make him work for me and make him prove that he loves me before dating him. Make him fall in love with you and want you. If you see all he’s doing is flirting with everybody and not treating you special – what’s the point? You got beach-blonde sexy guy and at least 5 other high-quality guys at your school that’d give an arm and a leg to date you! -Kayce

I can’t stop shopping at Wal-Mart & Mom is Furious!

Q. I am 19 and still live at home with mom. Well mom is great and we’re good friends but she gets mad every time I go to Walmart. I’ll start to leave the house and she’ll ask where I’m going and I’ll tell her Walmart and she’ll just sit there all upset. Then she’ll call me on my cell when I’m there asking me to bring home dinner at least. Last night she came into my room and wanted to see what I bought at Walmart. I showed her my shoes and she questioned my sense of fashion. She said I have no space in
my room and should sell some things on eBay. This morning while I was at Walmart she called me on my cell and told me she needed the car so I should hurry. We got into a big fight tonight when I tried sneaking out of the house. She started yelling at me that I better not be going back to Walmart. It was only 10pm and I don’t have a curfew. Why is she always on my case? I’m not a little kid anymore and I spend my own money that I’ve saved up. -Randy,19, KY

Advice: Well, moms are like that. Unintentionally they were freaks when it comes to their children’s welfare. Maybe your mom is just worry about your whereabouts and she don’t know how to tell you that -how she feels. Maybe you misinterpret her concern. Always keep in mind that she’s still your mother and wants only the best for you.. -Glenda

Should I please my marine boyfriend or my family?

Q. I’m dating a wonderful guy who is going away to join the marines. He needs to go through boot camp and all that first. When he’s done I am going to live on base with him. He wants to marry me and wants me to have his baby when we start living together – you know – just in case he gets killed. My dad and brothers would disown me if I got pregnant and married at age 16. I turn 16 in April. I have a great relationship with them all. My dad is like a brother to me. i don’t want to lose them but I want to make my man proud and I want to be his wife and mother of his child. What should I do?-Tiffini,15, TX

Advice: Hey Tiffini, Can’t you see? You’re too young for that -that baby thing and marriage thing. Maybe
when you get pregnant, you make your man proud but how about your parents? your family? Do you think they will be proud of you?.. Well, just a piece of advice, think before you act!!.. Think of the consequences it will bring.. in the end the decision is still in your hands. May God bless you..-Glenda

I fell for my best friend!

Q. To put it simply, I fell for my best friend, and mind you… I fell HARD. It just started out this school year we were mere strangers from another dimension with each other, until he talked to me first. I was already aware that he likes another girl. I mean no harm to their relationship, I was even quite supportive. We became really close through the months until the time I started to look for him. I was excited to go to school and see him everyday. I know it’s wrong that’s why I kept silent all this time. And it really makes me feel nostalgia flowing through my veins. I seriously need help with my feelings. Each time I see him my world goes slow motion and I know that’s not the way it should be. Help me?
-Jaundice,16, Pl

Advice: Hi Jaundice. To be honest, in almost every guy-girl friendship – at least one friend likes the other as more than "just a friend". So many times somebody gets hurt. It’s really hard for you to tell this boy how you feel because you know he likes another girl – and as a friend you want to be supportive and not act jealous. Have you heard the song "Teardrops on My Guitar" by Taylor Swift? This song probably describes exactly how you feel. If you get brave enough – you should neatly write out the lyrics of this song or burn a copy of the song onto a CD and give the lyrics or CD to this boy. Tell him it’s hard for you to be friends with somebody you feel this way about, but you enjoy being around him so much that you stay being his friend although it kills you he likes another girl. Then give him time to think things over. Once he realizes that his best friend is interested in him that way – I think he will leave the other girl behind. But of course this will probably take some time. He is young and confused – he does not fully understand girls yet. If he knows that there is a girl like you that he can get along with so well that cares about him so much – I think he could fall for you no problem. Or, you can just keep things the way they are right now- and trust yourself that in time you will get bored of liking him. You will fall for somebody else, and by that time this boy will start liking you – and you probably won’t care because you’ll already be over him. Hope this helps a little! – Kayce

Am I Allowed to Kiss?